I asked for one of these with my coffee this morning and quickly told the barista, "Don't worry, I'm not going to eat it." I hope she didn't think I was insinuating I was going to put it up my butt. The obvious other thing one would do with a cake pop.
How did these become a thing? There is absolutely nothing "indulgent" about them. It's a waste of your life.
The icing isn't even icing-like. It's just straight-up, hard white chocolate. Gross.
And the cake part is a bastardization of what cake means. It's not fluffy, or complementary to the "icing." It is mushy and wet. Like, if you were a slave on a boat, and the pirates that took you hostage were having a birthday party on deck. And they got finished with the cake, and were in good enough moods to toss you some into your dank, moldy cell. But you didn't catch it right away, because you were asleep from exhaustion. You sleep a lot. So you wake up hours later, and see a blob of cake sitting in the corner that is now wet and a little stale. But you eat it anyway cuz, hey, you're a slave, you don't get a lot of perks. THAT is what a cake pop tastes like.
In conclusion, eat a cake pop when you want to feel really, really sorry for yourself.
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